Fragile future

i duno,and i dun wana know....high skl is 2 years, and it will dertermine where u r goin in the furture. i already start to feell pressure, i duno where i m heading, and i also duno what i m getting for IB. maybe 25?or 30?i m not sure. i want a 30 and i m working towards it. well i guess i missed alot of fun stuff in high school. i dun need fun. study is the first place. yea n jimmy is right, i m sexist,but so he is racist that is worse then me. yea whats so good abt WILSON? y people like him? well personally, people who knows wilson says hes gay....lol...ok but i guess i have lost my direction in life...n i m finding it.....everytime after a test, when i know i didnt do well, i got scared...bcoz that will affect my results...

but now i guess i have found what i reali want...yea and thats to get into a good university...but still on the other hand,life sucks...sometimes i think death is the best way to work things out, many music says that too...i duno...what to choose...can someone tell me what is dream and what is real? still i got to study,SAT for american universities....i wun change my mind,i m goin to USA. sometimes i feel that there is no need for me to log on msn,bcoz no one talks to me, and i reli hope someone does..but no one will.....well lets say, if u go into H1r and ask'Who hates Alex"? let me tell u the answer will be everyone(except jinwoong and deokwon). but i know this is the answer, i will just be me, yea i m anti class, anti society bcoz i dun wan to merge into such a society,a place that cause the scars in me.................so like i said,kill me.............n i m gone forever..............