Fragile Future 2

life apologises, i m regretting for all the things that i have done this year. thinking about it, making me feels bad, also, i guess im wasting my time in the holidays, so i got to work harder than b4. next year, i hope things will change, actually the world or life is very good. but i feel that my life sucks, because nth goes my way, i m not sure what is it inside me that prevents me from doing all the things i want, something that sucks all my energy away. i m a lonely guy, living on one small corner of the earth. what can i do? to make more friends? friends. yea a nice word,but friends will hurt u ttoo, so i never believe in friends totally(except for jeff,czuse i know him since young.) jeff and me both agree, love anint something good. we have different points of view. to me, love is like a suciding weapon, that will cause others to do all kinds of bad things, its a demon shape. therefore i prefer darkness and pain,because at least that is a feeling to me. i m not sure about me, m i wasting my time on earth here? i m not sure too,but at least i know i m here for a goal.UNIVERSITY. apologises, back to me, i cant stand it anymore,this years christmas was colder than before, and also the christmas night was darker than b4. my life hurts more than b4 too,because i feel worse than b4,..........